Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Today's Quote

I've been reading the Ender series by Orson Scott Card these days, since the movie came out and I had never read it when it came out as a teenager.

On the commute this morning, this quote from Mazer Rackham struck me:

"Life is full of grief, to exactly the degree we allow ourselves to love other people."

One could argue the validity of this comment from both sides, but it made me reflect upon the sacrifices and compromises one makes as a father and a husband.

My son is leaving home soon while my youngest daughter is celebrating her 18th birthday in a few days. I'm already feeling nostalgic for the days when they were dependent on our care. From my perspective, my son has turned into a young man of promising potential who is still trying to figure out where his path in life is heading. My daughter is poised at the cusp of her professional life and seemingly hesitant to throw herself blindly in any direction, preferring to take the time to analyze her options.

I could have done more for my family.

I could have been better.

This is not regret. It is simply an observation.

As for grief, who knows what the years will bring. But even as a strongly independent man I would not want to go back in time and live the life that could have been without the presence of my wife and my children. They are part of me now, regardless of time and space.

For me, this "grief" is a small price to pay for loving others.

Right now, I need to figure out how to best address their doubt, while ignoring my own.

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